About Persona

Time is simply a scale. Time won’t tell, but the passage of time will allow us to. We are the ones who will tell what we have done with it. We are the ones who will judge (or be judged). We are the ones who will need to account, to ourselves at the very least, to our family at the worst. Don’t worry about what the rest of the world thinks of us, you can’t do much about that. We will have to account for what we do, what we have done and how it has affected others. I’m not talking the final judgement day or anything, but the accounting we do when we look back over our time. Whether we are held to account, or hold ourselves to account. Time and history will provide a scale for us to understand how we used our time. Effectively, compassionately, for some, violently. But how do we see ourselves, regardless of how others see us. Can we look back over our time with pride? Or with shame? Are there personal ‘successes’, and how do we look at our ‘failures’? Are we satisfied we did the best we could with what we had, or, did we try harder for what we didn’t. Many people comment that coming second is never as good as winning. I think, if you were in the race, you achieved.

There have been many, many stories, books, films, and television series which have explored human history. Often it has centred around one iconic figure. Famous, or infamous. But it has looked at the influence of that person on those around them. Seldom do such programmes look at the ‘actual’ person. We are instead shown the perceived ‘persona’ often interpreted many years later. We can’t ever understand what the actual person thought or what desires drove them to behave as they did. We cannot get inside the head of someone who is no longer alive. We can read their writings and perhaps glean a certain understanding. But even then, today it is individual researchers, not major media who can present a truer picture of any individual, rather than the perceived image of that individual. But all of this occurs over time.

I know speaking personally, I do not yet use my time as effectively as I should.

People always laugh at how I don’t appear to sleep much. I do, it just seems that whenever people talk to me I am awake (not as strange as it sounds). To always see me awake… they must have been awake too. Logically. I am awake at odd hours and for long (sometimes very long) periods of time (sometimes because of the job, sometimes not) but I would still sleep for about six hours a day. Usually. Sometimes. They also say that I work too much (a lot of it unpaid, one of the problems with loving your job). That could be true, but the essence of that is, I am always trying to learn something else. Yet, I honestly believe I probably waste half my time. I am still learning to use it better, but it isn’t easy.

(Continued tomorrow)